crzymom2six

I have been so incredibly busy the last two weeks. My days have been occupied by life in airport land. And my nights have been spent trying to get over this respiratory illness that has consumed me. I have worked the last eleven days straight.

And airport land has been a very boring place lately. I guess the  incredibly bad economy has finally started to reach the airline industry. The number of people coming through our airport has dropped tremendously. The only excitement today was watching a man get arrested for DUI. Ya it was a very boring day. Hopefully, things will pick up some this summer.

I have also been struggling very hard to fight back against a respiratory illness. It has hit me so hard that I barely sleep at night. Right now the plan to beat it is to get some major rest this weekend. I hope to beat it without going to the Doctor to get some antibiotics. Wish me luck!!!

This is not a story of epic proportions, or a comical relief story. It is a story of an ordinary woman who did the right thing. A feel good story if you will, and the kind of story I need to write about now.

From Bellevue, Washington  a woman who was behind on her rent, facing eviction, and as broke as could be, discovers a 250,000 dollar mistake in her bank account, and gives it back to the bank. That’s right she went to the bank ATM to withdraw money and was shocked when she saw the balance in her account. The statement said her balance was 271,366.01 to be exact.

Now the amazing part is that this single mother who was facing eviction for being behind in her rent, gave it back to the bank. She said that it was the right thing to do as a child of God. Sure she admits to mentally having fantasies of spending the money, but she couldn’t do it.

It turns out that the bank made a mistake and issued her a new ATM card for the wrong account. The account actually belonged to an adult correctional facility. She said that when all was said and done at the end of the day, she paid her rent and was 3.00 dollars in the hole. But she felt good about what she had done.

Now the question is…….Could you do that? If you suddenly found yourself in the same position would you give it back? The answer for me would be yes.  And I actually did find myself in a similar spot. Last year a business that my husband and I deal with sent us our bill for a purchase we had made, and inside was a check for over 11,00.00. The check it turns out was meant to be sent to a business to pay a bill, but it ended up in our envelope by mistake. We did return the check the next day. And like the lady in this story we felt pretty darned good about it.

I don’t know about you, but at the end of my days I want to know that I did the right thing.

Embedded video from CNN Video

This is the funniest thing I have read all week. This weeks news story comes to us from China, and boy is it a good one.

The story goes like this…..Two lovers meet in a park. They get into a car and proceed to start having fun. Then a van backs out of it’s parking space and bumps into the couples’ car. Suddenly a man lets out a blood curdling scream and the woman jumps out of the car with blood around her mouth. Was it a ferocious cannibal on the attack in the park? Or was it a scorned lover taking revenge?

Well, the answer is that the couple was engaging in oral sex. And when the van backed into the couples’ car, the force of the impact caused the woman to bite down……..and she bit her lovers penis off.  Now little did the couple know, but they had been followed to the park. The victim in this case as it turns out is married. And his wife had hired a private investigator to follow her husband, because she thought he was cheating on her.

So, the investigator was in a car nearby spying on the husband, when the accident happened. He was kind enough to call the ambulance to take the man to the hospital. Now your probably asking what happened to the penis…….it was recovered by his lover and was taken to the hospital. No word yet as to whether the doctors were able to reattach his penis.

Now one can only imagine the reaction from his wife. Was she angry or just laughing her head off. The answer will have to remain a mystery. I can only hope that she laughs hysterically as she serve her husband with divorce papers.

One can only hope that he has learned his lesson that cheating doesn’t pay. But, I don’t think he will be engaging in any extracurricular activities anytime soon.

 Read The Story Here

Well here we are again, another week another pandemic. Some might call me crazy for making light of it, but personally I find it friggin’ hilarious.

For those of you that don’t know already, I work in airport land. Airport land can be a very strange place at times. Well when the swine flu reared it’s ugly head, it caused quite a stir. Suddenly everywhere I look there were people wearing masks like it was the end of the world. They were glued to the big screen TV’s for all the latest updates. And a sense  of panic had started to set in. Even my employer brought out the hospital grade masks to be opened in the event of a “Mass Outbreak”.  And in the middle of it all was me.

Sure I kept up with the latest updates from my employer on new procedures we had to implement. And I had to be extra vigilant in cleaning my hands and our equipment. I even bought some hand sanitizer to put in my pocket and avoided touching things without good reason. But after a few days I realized that this pandemic was nothing out of the ordinary. A little known fact is that the regular old flu has killed 13,000 people in the U.S. since January. And worldwide it kills about 250,000 to 500,000 people a year. So forgive me if a flu that has only sickened a few hundred and killed some doesn’t cause panic in me. What really had me thinking was the panic that the flu is “spreading” around the globe. Has everyone forgotten that spring break was just a few weeks ago. And one of the most popular destinations for spring breakers is Mexico. So, I find it to be perfectly logical that you would see swine flu around the globe. Just stop and ponder the ease at which a person can hop on an airplane, fly for a few hours and be at ground zero just to in time to have a front row seat for a major flu outbreak. Then you can hop on another plane and take your infected backside back to your home country to share the virus with your friends and loved ones.

Well enough about the swine flu or H1N1 as they like to call it to prevent people from freaking out at the thought of eating bacon. We have been so obsessed this week we have missed some truly great stories like this one.

Couple arrested for sex on lawn at Windsor Castle. Hmmmm how could we have overlooked this classic story of love? It seems that the couple was quite drunk when they wandered onto the lawn at Windsor Castle and proceeded to begin having sex. Never mind that the building and the garden area was packed with tourists. The best part is that Japanese tourist were filming this and the couple seemed oblivious to it. They just kept on enjoying themselves. Well sort of, at least until the police showed up.

Now imagine you wake up in a jail cell and your not quite sure how you got there. I mean heck the last thing you remember is being in a restaurant, enjoying a healthy size pint of beer, and checking out a really hot guy. And now the police want to know why you were having sex on the queens front lawn.  And your desperately trying to figure out why the ugliest man in the world is blowing kisses at you and thanking you for the great time last night.

Oh my too funny. Check out the story for yourself here

Have a great week folks and remember to: A. Stop kissing your neighbors pig and B. Wash your hands please, especially after picking the giant wedgie out of your butt crack or for the men after engaging in some heavy ball handling.

Who wouldn’t want to wow all their former classmates at their High School reunion? I know I would, that is why I love the idea of what this lady did.

As I was doing my daily check of the news on CNN I came across this story, and couldn’t resist checking it out. It seems that a woman in California came up with the idea of hiring a stripper to represent her at her 10 year reunion. She rented a room above the ballroom, bought her ticket and selected the stripper. On the day of the reunion, she had a camera that allowed her to see what was going on. And to make it seem like it really was her at the reunion, the stripper wore an earpiece. This allowed Andrea to talk to her and feed her with information. Things like names, little facts about people. All was going well until the stripper decided to dance to a song.

I won’t tell you how the rest of the story goes. All I can say is I wish I had thought of this when my reunion came around. Maybe I would have had more fun than I did. Anyways I do suggest checking out her blog, it is a good read. You can check it out here.

And I also suggest checking out the video on CNN.com

For the news video click here

A woman in Detroit credits her bra for deflecting a bullet. It seems that on Tuesday the woman heard a burglar alarm coming from across the street, and then went to a window to look outside. When she did, one of three burglars fired a shot that smashed through her window. It seems that the bullet then was deflected off of her underwire bra.Thankfully her bra prevented the bullet from penetrating the skin.

Now the only thing that pops into my head is that she must be very well endowed. Or she was wearing one of those lunchroom ladies bras. Then the other question that comes to mind is, just how big is that wire in her bra? It seems that it would have to be of an exceptionally large size to deflect a bullet. Who knows maybe it was her guardian angel stepping in to save the day. I guess it will just be yet another unexplained mystery.

Check It Out For Yourself

Just another boring old hum drum kind of week here. Nothing really new has happened here this week. I have to say though that I am thrilled to death that the kids return to school on Monday.

Am I the only person in the country that believes that school age children are given far too many days off. Between Christmas vacations, Easter break, Spring break, midwinter break and so it goes on and on, far too many to list here that is for sure. And that is not to even mention Summer vacation. They spend almost as much time on break as they do in the classroom.  Can you imagine what it would be like if like children in France, our children attended school on Saturday? If they did perhaps we wouldn’t have the failure rates that we do.

So, here’s hoping that everyone has a good week. I will be scouring the papers for the fun articles again. Just won’t be here as much since we are down to just one computer again. Hopefully just a temporary problem with my laptop. So, if everything goes right I will be back full speed ahead by weeks end.

What a long week this is turning out to be. Despite the Easter break at our public schools I still have to get up at the crack of dawn. You would think that this would be a week where I could sleep in, think again.

Since one of my nieces is in Cosmetology school she has to attend school all year round. Even during school breaks. The only days she does not have school is Christmas and Sundays. Now can you say that this sucks cow puckey. And since she does not drive I get to lug her butt to school everyday including Saturdays.  So, that means there is no sleeping in around my house for me. Now you would think that my wonderful husband would shoulder some of the burden…… Not on your life. He is not about to drag his furry butt out of bed this week.

Now don’t get me wrong I am all for her going to trade school. At least she will have something that she can do to make money. And in this economy you need a job to fall back on. Or at least a skill that you can use to make money. So we want her to get not only her High School diploma but her Cosmetology license. I just wish she didn’t have to go to school 6 days a week. I have to keep reminding myself that it will all be worth it when all is said and done.

So, bear with me this week. If I nod off at my computer just splash a little water on my face or kick the monitor. And whatever you do don’t laugh at me when I have the keyboard imprint on my face from sleeping on it. Just smile and shake your head.

   Yet another exceptionally quiet weekend in my house. And it will be unbearably quiet tonight. And I can’t wait!!!

I am lucky enough that my nieces have once again gone to the city to spend the weekend with family and friends. And tonight my other two children will be going to spend the night with my daughters’ godmother. Talk about the ideal situation for any parent trying to do some serious relaxing. It will downright heavenly to not have to fight with my daughter about going to bed. Or to not hear the older children bicker over who’s turn it is to wash the bloody dishes.

On the upside, I think mom and dad are actually going to be able to take in a movie tonight. And  don’t think my oldest child will mind a bit when we do. For once we won’t have to hear a bunch of whiny ass teenage girls moan and groan about how unfair it is. Of course everything in life is unfair to them since they feel they deserve everything for nothing.

It has been a rough week in my house. We have endured far too much whining about how unfair life is. With most of it coming from my soon to be 17 yr old niece. Her Birthday is in a few days, and she feels that we should give her everything she wants. We decided to let her get her hair done the way she wants, which is costing a whopping $180 dollars. Then she wants clothes and another gift on top of that. And she wants it NOW!! She seems to forget that we can’t rearrange our entire life to fit her every whim.  And she also forgets that money is incredibly tight in this house. The best part is, that no matter how much we talk to her she fails tohave even a basic understanding of life.

Enough whining already. I am so glad that we have just over one year and they will be moving out on their own. Then we shall see how fair life is. And I truly hope that they get the best of everything that life has to offer.

A Saudi man had divorced his wife by sending her a text message.  Yep that is what I said, he sent her a text message that simple said you are no longer my wife.  Now how simple is that?

Well not just one text message was enough. Apparently he also called some of his relatives and said his marriage was over. And according to Saudi law he is divorced from his wife. In Saudi Arabia they practice something Sharia law, I guess it is a strict form of Islamic law. Then the divorce was finalised by a court in Jeddah city. According to the report this is the first known divorce by text message.

Now can you imagine the chaos that would ensue if divorce was that simple here. Divorce is already simple  enough as is. Now imagine just telling your spouse three times that I divorce you. Now ask yourself the question, if it was that simple would I be married today? Well I can honestly say that after reading this story to my husband he looked at me with the strangest look. And all I said was “not in our country, we don’t practice Sharia law.” And all he did was laugh.

I can honestly say that I don’t live in a country that practices a medieval form of law that allows women no rights.

Read The Story Here